Where do we go from here, and what did you do with directions? [W7, Thursday]

[hydrokinetics]

[He knew this was coming for a while now, but it didn't make it easier. He knew how it would happen, too, but it still didn't make it easier. Reading Noctis's letter was hard and there's a spike of shame and an equally large spike of affection for the boy when he reads it. It's why he immediately decides to follow his wishes and he seeks Milla out. He approaches quietly with an item in-hand, body obscuring it a little until he gets a gauge on her mood. No doubt she's feeling just as defeated.]

Hey, Milla...

Comments

[thatsthespirit]

Ah. You're right. Difficult situations do tend to bring people closer. I've always wondered why that is so.

[closes her hand around the device and lowers it into her lap, along with the noodles]

I know he is.

[both "okay" and "on the train." it eases her heart a little bit, but at the same time. . . is death ever easy, even when you know what lies beyond?]

. . . and I'm aware we'll all have to enter the train sooner or later, if we wish to go home.

[hydrokinetics]

[It's quiet. But he nods finally.]

You're sure that's the final way to go?

[thatsthespirit]

[. . . she nods, too]

I am.

The Sheriff hasn't outright lied to us yet, even if he hasn't been the most forthcoming.

This doesn't mean I'm happy about it, mind.

[hydrokinetics]

I don't think any of us would be. But at least the train is safe. And if that's really the way to go then we can finally get out of here. On the other hand call me crazy for not wanting to die right away.

[thatsthespirit]

[the noodles are cooler now. she finally lifts them up and twirls a few around her fork for a bite]

Percy.

It's never crazy to not want to die. Not when we all have so much to live for.

[hydrokinetics]

And if dying's the real answer...does that then make it selfish instead?

[He lets her eat the noodles, but he's leaning back against the tree and looking ahead instead of at her. Somehow it's easier to talk about this that way.]

[thatsthespirit]

Perhaps, although only in the context of this game.

[she sure isn't mincing words over here. but. . .]

But I don't see why that's a bad thing. Everyone is selfish, in some way or another. That's quintessentially human, isn't it?

Pushing back against that selfishness to do what one believes in their heart is the right thing. . . that's the true wonder of what humanity can accomplish.

[hydrokinetics]

I guess that makes sense. [Selfishness can lead people to doing the most awful things, but he doesn't think of that. He thinks and wonders if selfishness can sometimes be a good thing in this case. Doing what's right. Stuff like that.]

...you've learned a lot about humanity lately, haven't you?

[thatsthespirit]

I have. I have you and everyone else in our group to thank for that.

[that's why she likes humans so much. even after spending so much time with them back home, she's still learning. there are always new things for her to discover]

. . . have you learned anything, Percy? During your time here?

[hydrokinetics]

[A half-smile. What a bunch of a dumb humans to draw influence from.]

I've learned a lot here. I haven't figured out if it's all good or not. But I don't regret it. The people I met and the things I learned from them are definitely things I can't regret.

[thatsthespirit]

Mmmn. I feel the same. And whether what you've learned is good or bad. . . it's still something you've learned, isn't it?

And that's knowledge you can use for the future, whatever it may hold.

[hydrokinetics]

...how do you do it? Stay positive like this all the time even knowing what's coming? How do you manage to always do it?

[thatsthespirit]

[tilts her head towards him and offers a smile. it's tired, but no less full of the determination she had become so well known for]

I know I have no other choice but to go forward, regardless of what waits for me. And so forward is where I go.

[it's not much of an answer, but it's a difficult thing for her to explain. this is just the way she is. the way she's always been. the way she'll always be]

[hydrokinetics]

Where I'm from, being positive and moving forward aren't always mutually exclusive. [A tinge of a bitter grin comes with it.] Sometimes we just have to do it even if we know it's, like, the worst idea ever.

...it's something I try, but I don't think I could ever manage it the same way you do. It's kind of awesome.

[thatsthespirit]

I think you've managed quite well, Percy. Or at least, well enough.

[she still feels like he's the one she needs to thank for the Bounties uniting so quickly]

If you hadn't, I somehow don't think we would be sitting here talking right now.

[hydrokinetics]

[He ducks his head a bit.]

True. If I hadn't opened my big mouth and nearly blew Damian's cover, we wouldn't have found each other and we'd be in a lot worse condition than we are now. [On the other hand...it was sort of cool, wasn't it?] I don't like losing, Milla. That's never an option for me so that's why I have to keep going until this is completely over. Whatever that really means. I just wish sometimes it was easier to think everything's going to be okay no matter what.

[thatsthespirit]

You didn't nearly blow his cover. You pointed the right people in the right direction.

[she firmly believes this!!]

. . . and as long as you're still able to keep going forward when everything is over, I think you'll be okay.

I think all of us will, in the end.

[dat optimism]

[hydrokinetics]

[...he feels a weird amount of shame when she says that, even if he won't say why. It's hard to be optimistic when he knows all of the answers here, but he can't tell her. Why worry her? In the end he nods.]

We will. I promise. We'll be okay in the end. [He's just...going to shift a little to lean against her? Sorry, Milla.] Noctis would want us to keep going anyway. I might have helped find some of the right answers, but now we're stuck looking for the rest. I'll keep going if you do though.

[thatsthespirit]

[instinctively, she leans a little into him in return. she understands how comforting even the slightest physical contact can be in difficult times]

I think we've all come too far to give up on answers now. Don't you?

[hydrokinetics]

[It definitely, definitely helps.]

Of course I do. I just don't know if we're going to like the answers we're bound to find. Isn't that how it always works? The answers you spend forever looking for are always the worst ones. That's the part I don't know if I want.

[thatsthespirit]

It is, it's true.

[but somehow, knowing that doesn't scare her]

But I still don't think that's a reason to back down. To be frightened. . . perhaps. But I believe that fear is something you can push past.

[hydrokinetics]

...then we'll push past it together. Promise? [It's a stupid thing to make her promise, but it's the only thing he can think of while he knows what's coming. He needs to know that everything will work out.]